Before you get a new puppy here are some things to put into practice as part of ‘The Puppy Test‘
1. Buy a lead and tie it to a big stone, walk around dragging the stone behind you.
2. Get up at 5 am, go out in the pouring rain and walk up and down a muddy path, repeating good girl/boy, wee-wees… poo-poos, quickly, please
3. Stuff your pockets with plastic bags and pick up all the poo you can find, obviously not your dogs as you have not bought it yet ??
4. Start wearing your shoes indoors, especially during muddy times
5. Collect leaves off the ground and spread them on the floor
6. Carry sticks and branches indoors and chop them up on your carpet
7. Pour cold apple juice on the rug and floor….walk barefooted over it in the dark
8. Drop some chocolate pudding on your carpet in the morning and then try to clean it in the evening
9. Wear socks to which you have made holes using a blender
10. Jump out of your favorite chair just before the movie ends and run to open the back door
11. Cover all your best clothes with dog hair, dark clothes with blond hairs and light clothes with dark hairs
12. Tip all just ironed clothes on the floor
13. Make little pin holes in all your furniture, especially chair and table legs
14. When doing dishes, splash water all over the place and don’t wipe it.
15. Spread toilet paper all over the house when you leave the house and tidy up when you get back home
16. Forget any impulse holidays and/or breaks
17. Always go straight home after work or school
18. Go for walks no matter what the weather, and inspect every dirty paper, chewing gum and dead fly you might find
19. Stand at your back door at five in the morning shouting, “Bring Mr Bumble and Mr Lion in, its raining.”
20. Wake up at 3 am. Place a correct size bag of flour on top of yourself and try to sleep, whilst wiping your face with a dishcloth, which you have left next to your bed in a bowl last week. Repeat every day over 6 months and if you still think getting a puppy sounds like a good idea, Congratulations, you might be ready to get your puppy.
This is funny but on a serious note, think long and hard because having a puppy is not easy.
You will likely be exhausted and cut to shreds for the first couple of months at least. It gets easier but it is a commitment for at least a decade. Make sure it is what you want and you are willing to put the time in and you will be rewarded with a friend, companion, and endless fun and love.